The perfect bridal shower

Although the traditional Mehndi night is more or less the Desi version of a bridal shower, westernized versions of bridal showers have become a popular addition to South Asian-American wedding culture. The Sari-Clad Bride understands the responsibilities that come with planning a bridal shower so here are our guidelines to make your shower-planning a breeze:

At least 6 weeks ahead:

• Consult the bride: Whether you are planning a surprise shower or not, it is necessary and helpful to consult the bride about what kind of event she would like, possible guests, shower registry and date (or dates if it is a surprise!). After all it is her shower and you want to make sure that she is happy with the outcome.

• Consult bridesmaids, family and close friends for help: Even if you want to throw a shower for your bride all by yourself because you love her that much, it is courteous that you ask her friends and family if they would like to help host or be part of it. This also helps to take some of the financial burden off your shoulders.

• Set a guest list, time and date: You must make sure there are no scheduling conflicts with the more important guests such as the bride and groom’s mothers, wedding party, closest family members and friends. Collect contact information for all your guests to send out the invitations.

At least 5 weeks ahead:

• Set a venue and theme: Consult your co-hosts about where to throw the shower and what kind of theme, if any, you should have. You should already have a good idea as to what the bride wants by now. When choosing a venue, keep your guest list in mind. Be considerate towards the size of your venue as well as the location. You want to make sure it is easily accessible by your guests. If you are considering a location which needs reservation, this is the time to do so. Make sure the theme you choose is appropriate for your venue as well. Keep in mind the type of decorations you will need to carry out your theme.

• Choose food and entertainment: Whether you decide to intertwine these with your theme or not, you should decide this by now. When setting a menu, again, keep in mind whether your guests have preferences such as halal or vegetarian food. Figure out if you would like to cook, have a pot-luck or have it catered. Don’t forget the cake! Also decide on the games, activities, music, etc for the shower. For Desi showers, you might have someone sing or dance for the bride, or decide to have a henna artist do henna for the guests. Think about how many games you would want and whether to have prizes for winners. Choose what kind of invitations and party favors you would like for the event.

• Assign duties and budget yourself: This should be done as early as possible. Have all duties divided amongst your co-hosts and/or helpers so that you are not burdened with everything at the last minute. Choose responsible people and learn to have faith! Estimate how much you will spend on the venue, decoration, food, entertainment, and miscellaneous items such as invitations, party favors, utensils, etc.

At least 4 weeks ahead:

• Send out invitations: You need to give sufficient time for your guests to confirm or decline. You should ask for your guests to RSVP as soon as possible or at the latest two weeks before your event.

• Book entertainment: If you plan on having a DJ, a henna artist, or have close friends or family members perform, now is the time to contact them. Discuss what they would like to do and what they might need at the shower.

• Order online: if you are ordering items online, such as party favors or personalized items, decorations, etc, you should give yourself enough time to receive and if necessary, return or exchange your items before your event.

At least 3 weeks ahead:

• Regroup with your co-hosts and helpers: Make sure everyone is on the same page. This is a good time to discuss any changes in plans and timing issues and if duties need to be reassigned.

At least 2 weeks ahead:

• Confirm with your guests: You should always do so before ordering food and/or buying groceries. Find out if additional guests will be joining.

• Place your orders: Start placing orders for cake, catered food and equipment, flowers and rentals for decorations, such as tables and chairs. Don’t forget the bridal chair!

• Go shopping: Start picking up items for your decorations, linens, utensils, party favors, shower gifts, games, and prizes.

At least 1 week ahead:

• Grocery shopping: If you are cooking for your event, this is the time to pick up all necessary items. Don’t forget the drinks!

• Confirm specifics: Make sure your venue reservation is in place. If your guests offered to bring food, contact them as well to make sure they still are. Contact all those who are providing entertainment to confirm date and time. Contact all vendors to confirm orders and deliveries.

• Finishing touches: If you are providing your own music, make the CDs you need, assemble party favors and games if needed, wrap gifts and prizes, create personalized items and decorations.

The day before:

• Prepare in advance: Do all you can do today. This goes for decorations, prep-work for cooking, picking up chairs, tables and rentals, and any other last-minute necessities.

The day of:

• Prepare all food and drinks: Whether you are cooking yourself or having your guests bring items or catering, you should have all your food prepared and ready to be served.

• Run your errands: Pick up anything all necessary items such as the cake, treats, flowers and rental equipment. Don’t’ forget the ice!

• Arrive early: The host and co-hosts should be there to receive guests. That means you should be the first ones there. You should also be there to receive any deliveries to arrive.

• Last -minute details: Don’t forget to take lots of pictures, have a book or poster for your guests to sign and wish the bride well, have a place for all the bride’s gifts and distribute the party favors. Make sure you have a list of the guests and their gifts to the bride so that she can send out thank you notes.